Episodes

Monday Jun 12, 2023
175 - When Wanking Off Turns Deadly
Monday Jun 12, 2023
Monday Jun 12, 2023
Guten Tag, gopher nuts! Join the fellas for another life saving podcast! We discuss casual racism at a local ice cream shop, how you can tell if a neighborhood is safe by the availability of a usable toilet, and why you should pay attention to your brother even when you're jerking off. The creator of the Silk Road writes in and offers to pay us to stick drugs up our butts and sneak them into jail for him. Some guy wants Chris to take pictures of him wanking off to his pictures of his wife. Jason gets upset when a Jamaican guy recommended a white reggae band to him. The guys giggle at a list of porn star names. Tell your bird to take a walk and relax with the fellas for a quick chuckle.

Monday May 29, 2023
174 - The Shame Shack w/ Whoopi
Monday May 29, 2023
Monday May 29, 2023
Hey fatty! Stop pretending you can see your dong and tune into this week's show! Whoopi joins the fellas this week to hit on all the hot news of the week. Jason hates Whoopi's shirt. Chris gets mad dogged after staring hard at a dude's girlfriend. Jason asks his wife if she's shopping in the fatty section and a grumpy looking plump lady gets angry at him. Whoopi tells us that she's going to get all the D now that she's swimming. The Hairy guy is eating 6 pounds of spaghetti a day because he's an idiot. Mr. Bert stops by to review a few movies and tell us about his uncle's spitting serpent. All that and Chris is still old. Listen up!

Sunday May 21, 2023
173 - Bust a Nut in Your Macaroni feat. Juggalo Josh
Sunday May 21, 2023
Sunday May 21, 2023
Ladies and gentleman Welcome to your death! Now let's see where you're headed. Turn the crank and experience what's in store for you. Don't worry it's not the Riddle Box, it's just another life saving episode of Shut Up Cincinnati. This week we are joined by local Juggalo, Josh H. We get deep into the Dark Carnival and discuss what it means to be a Juggalo. We let Josh sell us on going to the upcoming Gathering of the Juggalos but Chris just seems interested in the "Show Us Your Butthole" tent. We find out that one of our favorite Juggalos, "the whippit guy," is a dear friend of Josh's. We talk about Super Humman but can't neither confirm or deny that he is a window licker. Jason tells us about his sewer issues and the 5ft hole full of poop that the plumbers had to wade in so the family can crap in the house again. Chris defends himself against being a 1980ties rapist. Hairy Guy catches shit for being a creep as well as blamed for Jason not hitting record again. We do some segments and call it a day. Whoop! Whoop!

Sunday May 07, 2023
172 - Wear Some Socks, Peckerhead!
Sunday May 07, 2023
Sunday May 07, 2023
Hello taint touchers! Join us this week as we solve all the world's problems. Chris tries a new butt toy. Jason warns guys to stop wearing sandals unless they want to die alone. No one likes tipping on take out orders. Where did the stripper put a man's dentures? How can you buy meth and heroin in Canada from a mobile truck? Why do people that can't handle their alcohol pretend like they got drugged to make up for their horrible behavior? We talked about other stuff too but it's a secret unless you listen so tune in, buttercup!

Sunday Apr 30, 2023
171 - My First Rub & Tug
Sunday Apr 30, 2023
Sunday Apr 30, 2023
Bonjour buttsniffers! Join us for the most important podcast in the world. Chris crosses another feat off his bucket list and visits a rub and tug. Jason has a dream where he joins a cult and murders people. After months of begging like a couple of sissies, a few listeners email the show. Jason tries to convince Chris the Bengal's draft didn't suck. The guys talk about the finer points of Juggalos. Put down the bagel, bite down on that pillow and tune in!

Tuesday Apr 25, 2023
170 - Crocodile Dung Contraceptives
Tuesday Apr 25, 2023
Tuesday Apr 25, 2023
What it be, pecker peepers? Join us for a most fabulous podcast where we solve all the world's mysteries. What kind of poop did Cleopatra use as birth control? Will Tucker Carlson and Don Lemon die alone in squalor after losing their jobs? Will the Bengal's draft a punter in the first round and will anyone draft a white cornerback? Will the Hairy Guy get laid in Spain or will he just disappoint America? What are the odds that Travis Tritt doesn't occasionally think of wieners? All these questions are answered and a lot more. Tune in, buttercup!

Monday Apr 17, 2023
169 - One Lucky Gay w/ Brent Wolgamott
Monday Apr 17, 2023
Monday Apr 17, 2023
Howdy Doody peckerheads! This week the guys are joined by Brent Wolgamott. Brent is an open book and this episode gets fun quick when he shows the guys one of his openings just a minute or so into the show. We tackle stereotypes, play a round of "Top or Bottom", and learn some new terms. Brent finds out that Chris is his straight spirit animal. I can't do this episode justice in the summary so just enjoy the show.

Monday Apr 03, 2023
168 - Poop Bag Guy and the Wrestling Dork
Monday Apr 03, 2023
Monday Apr 03, 2023
Hello pecker peepers! The guys are solo after getting ditched by another guest. We still get around to solving all the world's biggest problems. Can Kishon finally pay Chris in a timely matter or is it more funny to watch Chris get angry about it every year? Will Jason finally lose fat on the new Hollywood diet drug? On Naked and Afraid, Chris would bring a fishing pole and Jason would bring weed with both only planning on staying a couple of days. Chris is going to be pooping in a bag soon and actually turned down sex. Energy drinks are white trash. Jason admits to being a dork for watching wrestling. All that and some other stuff and then that crap and then probably some things. Tune in, fluffy nips!

Sunday Mar 26, 2023
167 - Licking Spunky Windows
Sunday Mar 26, 2023
Sunday Mar 26, 2023
Howdy doody pecker heads! Welcome to another super duper important podcast! We answer all of life's biggest mysteries. Why would someone want you to ejaculate on their windows? Who showed their dong at a local Petsmart? Why is Chris obsessed with his friend's giant schlong after all these years? What kind of doctor acts shocked over the size of a kid's unit? If you haven't noticed yet, there's a whole lot of penis talk this week for whatever reason. We talk about other things too but get ready for a butt-load of conversation about the ol' bald headed yogurt slinger. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Sunday Mar 19, 2023
166 - Shoplifting Mad Dog 20/20
Sunday Mar 19, 2023
Sunday Mar 19, 2023
What's up buttercups? Join the fellas this week for a chat about the most important crap ever. Does it hurt to get kicked in the dong if the sack isn't touched? Is leg and pit hair on a lady a deal breaker? Which decade was better, the 80ties or 90ties? Would you pee on Taylor Swift's feet if they were on fire? Will Percocet make you last longer in the sack? Chris updates us on the body building cucks. Jason's kid spends 300 dollars on a phone game. Chris is looking to visit a rub and tug joint. All that and we debate how much money we would take to help a diddler out of jail. Join us, Peckernecks.